Despite high hopes for this year… it has definitely been a year of great challenge.
In unexpected ways… in surprising ways. *Smile*
In the first six months of the year, my health improved greatly, and my weight decreased surprisingly. *Grin* However, in July, unexpectedly for no apparent reason, my health took a dive and my weight took a jump up. Seriously. It could be as my doctor explained it and that I was ‘stressed out’ …although I struggle to understand that, as for me and my family, I seemed more calm and relaxed… and even happier. *Smile*
I started working again at home for the first time in two years… and despite the challenges of that, I was so happy in my work it was fun and exciting. I know sleep was illusive which is not unusual for me, and our doctor gave me something that should have helped me to sleep.
I’m supposed to get into bed, take the pill and be asleep in 20 to 30 minutes. Under no circumstances am I to take the pill before I get into bed. In most instances I was asleep in about two hours if I was really tired… I did manage between 6 and 7 hours sleep on a few occasions and twice during the past six months I’ve had 8 hours of sleep… a very rare occurrence for me. *Grin*
Usually, at this time of year…. I write about what I’ve achieved, what I learnt, what projects I completed ~ in my personal journal of course, *Grin* and then I take time to reflect on my lessons and all that I’m thankful for.
At this moment on the 31st December 2014, when I usually would have taken the day to write about my year in reflection… all I can think about are these three things.
- I still need to learn balance in my daily activities… chores, work, email, crafting, resting, relaxing and spending time with my family. Usually, I do too much of one thing and not enough of the other and go non-stop until I’m too tired to do anymore. *Smile* One thing I do know, I have developed a deep love of the scriptures, and when I take time at the start of my day to read something inspiring, and the scriptures and to say a prayer… I have a much better, much more productive day. *Grin*
- Sometimes I have to do less in order to do more.
Although that may seem like a contradiction in terms, especially for a busy person like me… it’s when I seem to be ‘working’ less… or cleaning a drawer, or sorting out a storage box, that I am at my most productive… because although I’m not working, and seem to be completely unproductive, what I’m doing is keeping my hands busy…. moving my body with something that seems mundane… while my very busy brain and chaotic mind are chatting away to each other, figuring stuff out… or my very linear left brain is debating with my very creative right brain, and trying to find balance and take a fanciful creative whimsical idea and make it into reality. *Grin* And the why, how, when, what. - Faith and belief always make the difference.
Even when I’m being really creative, if I don’t feel inspired… if I don’t believe in myself and what I’m doing… and I’m struggling with my faith… whether that’s faith in God, or faith in what I believe, I’m wasting my time. So I take a moment… or two… and sometimes that moment or two can last a day… or a week… or a month or more. Not to do nothing, but to do things slower, in a less defined more exploratory way. *Smile*
And that clichéd or not… it’s important to find joy in the journey and to be grateful, no matter my circumstances and despite what circumstances I find myself traversing. *Smile*
I’m so grateful for so much… I even started a gratitude journal in September, titled, “A Thousand Blessings” adding to it every day. Finding beauty, blessings and miracles in every moment of every day, each time I paused to discover them. *Smile*
Some years I wake early on the 31st December, and I rush through my morning routine, breathless in anticipation of writing all that’s in my heart. This morning as the first rays of sunlight lightened the dawn, I turned over and snuggled beneath the covers. Then the dog bumped my hand for affection, and after a scratch of her ear… I turned over and snuggled even more deeply under the covers. I felt guilty about that, and went downstairs to check the door was open for the dogs to go out, that the bunnies were all still in their various cages and that Jess was okay… then I went back to bed and snuggled under the covers while my hubby rubbed my back… so I fell asleep. *Grin*
Even at 7:40am when my husband decided he had to get up and move around… I stayed in bed while he ran me a bath. *LOL*
Briefly, if I had to measure my year 2014 with my productivity, work, projects completed, how my garden looks, harvest from the veggie garden, how my house looks, and the nature of our budget at any given time this year… it could easily be remembered as a very definitive year of failure.
However, if I take a moment to reflect on all the immeasurables… time spent with Jess, giving her love and support, her healing… time spent with my family, the love I have for them, and the gratitude I feel for them… lessons learned, understanding gained, gifts of wisdom and understanding… a few completed projects that will never be finished, *Grin* like this Woman of Worth website… finally having my Woman of Worth Notebooks in my hand as a finished, marketable saleable product (*Huge, GINORMOUS freaking Grin*) and blessings and miracles from Heaven, with special people in our lives… then this has been the most amazing successful year ever… and the very best foundation to an awesome amazing incredible spectacular 2015. *Grin*
So I’m choosing something I wrote to myself a few years ago… to celebrate the day. *Smile*
Give beyond reason.
Care beyond hope.
Have Faith without bounds.
Love without limit…
Reach, stretch, and dream, in spite of your fears!
Dare to be.
Shine your light.
Cry when you want,
Laugh everyday…
Because of your years!
Celebrate the day, share your life,
and always remember (no matter what),
You are the gift you give and receive!
These are in deed,
Badges of honour…
Aspirations of Divinity!
Happy New Year 2015
I’m so excited to get started, *Smile*
Wishing you love and laughter to you and yours
Mands
© Mandy Swinburne
